It has been my observation over the last 29 years and 11 months that much of our lives are made up of perfect moments. This evening, I was watching a terrible TV show in which a man was trying to find the perfect moment to propose to his girlfriend. The moment never presented itself, so he set a deadline by which it had to be done. I missed the ending, but I'm going to assume it ended badly. Why? In my opinion, deadlines most often are hindrances. I'm not referring to work deadlines or doctor appointment deadlines...I'm talking about the deadlines we put on ourselves. The deadlines we believe will encourage us to move forward in life, but often just leave us feeling let down. Had he waited for the perfect moment to happen naturally...well, I missed the ending, but I can imagine.
I set a deadline recently. It was a deadline in my career. After 11 years co-hosting a radio show I decided to give it one more year before moving on to a new adventure. I made this decision sometime around August 2006. On September 7th, while sitting in 'yet another' meeting with my boss, I resigned. It was not in my plan, but the words were out of my mouth before I knew what had happened.
My friends and my family all told me to expect a major depression. Losing a career can be like loosing a friend, it hurts! Outside of a few days of schedule adjustment, the depression never came. Which caused me to wonder if I was out of my mind! Maybe I should have waited for that deadline, kept the steady paycheck and stability. Recently, however, I received a rare glimpse inside my soul. I was asked to be a guest on a local radio show. They wanted to discuss voice acting and much more. It went relatively well, and I enjoyed it.
I didn't love it.
I didn't miss it.
Wow. In a spur-of-the-moment decision racked with madness on a random September day, I changed my life. It was the right choice! I followed the tiny voice in my head that screamed, 'NOW'!
In one month I will turn 30. 30! Earlier in my life I had set a deadline that by 30 I would be married and with children. I am married, but I don't have any children and am not expecting any in the next 9 months (or for several months thereafter)! For many women I know, this would cause a major sense of failure. Now, I am not wise by any means, but I know that this does not mean I have failed. I am waiting for that perfect moment, the one where a voice in my head (and my husband's head) says, 'Now'! Until that time, I will not feel like I am in any rush. There is no deadline.
A perfect moment is not created, it happens all on it's own. If we spend our time setting deadlines as to when things should happen by- we might miss one of those moments. I felt that I should set a deadline when I began working for myself. One year. If, in one year, I was not successful I would get a 'real' job. But what is success? I once ignored a deadline and I successfully found my passion in life.
I found my perfect moment and I won't be waiting for the next one. I will live in this one.